New descriptive term for librarians: ferocious

Posted: August 20, 2009 in Uncategorized

12 Things: Librarians not to mess with

Louis Peitzman

Thursday, August 20, 2009

1. Henry DeTamble (“The Time Traveler’s Wife”)

Henry doesn’t just time travel – he also lies, steals and drinks just about everyone under the table. Who said librarians were mild-mannered?

2. Rupert Giles (“Buffy the Vampire Slayer”)

Sure, he gets knocked unconscious more often than any other character, but he’s also handy in a fight or when researching ancient evil.

3. Evy Carnahan-O’Connell (“The Mummy” series)

Behind every great male adventurer, there has to be a great female librarian. Evy even manages to come back from the dead, using, of course, a book.

4. Flynn Carsen (“The Librarian” series)

Noah Wyle doesn’t exactly have action-star looks, but he buffed up for his turn as the titular librarian in this ridiculous made-for-TV series.

5. Karma (Marvel Comics)

When she’s not shelving books at the University of Chicago library, Karma is seriously messing with your head. No, literally: She can control minds.

6. The Librarian of Unseen University (“Discworld”)

The Librarian may look like an orangutan, but don’t call him a “monkey” unless you’re prepared to face the violent consequences.

7. Marian Paroo (“The Music Man”)

OK, she’s a little less powerful than the others on this list, but it takes some real sway to reform a professional con artist like Harold Hill.

8. Alicia Hull (“Storm Center”)

Again, it’s not all about physical strength. Fighting against censorship, Bette Davis’ Alicia Hull is a force to be reckoned with.

9. Tsui Chik (“Black Mask”)

Jet Li thinks he’s a librarian, but he’s actually a government-trained supersoldier. Not that library work can’t be equally hard core.

10. Mike Hanlon (“It”)

Over the course of Stephen King’s epic novel, Hanlon battles racist bullies, his fading memory and – oh, yeah – the ultimate evil.

11. Conan the Librarian (“UHF”)

Though more a gag than a character, Conan the Librarian will forever be remembered for his battle cry: “Don’t you know the Dewey Decimal System?”

12. Lisa Guidarini (Various)

Occasionally wears high heels to work, has never worn her hair in a bun, and does not own one of those bead glasses hanger thingies. Rebel with a cause. And do not feed her after midnight!

– Louis Peitzman,


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